My memories of that day are spotty. I remember the morning clearly - getting up and driving to Abbott, waiting with my mom and Phil, going back to pre-op and changing and answering a million questions and taking a pregnancy test and starting the IV. After surgery, I remember my nurse anesthetist saying "All done, Amy!! You did great!!!" into my ear as she wheeled me into the recovery room. I remember feeling like my brain was stuck in honey or jello or something all day - sticky and slow and tired...so very tired...wanting to stay awake but falling in and out of sleep all day. I remember doing laps around the nurses station that night - alone - with my IV pole - and thinking about what I had just done. And being really scared that it was done.
The year has gone by - and would have passed whether I had surgery or not. Buy my GOD am I so happy I took the plunge. I'm so thankful for the opportunity to have had it done...and so blessed that I mustered up the courage to do it. The person I was a year and more ago was not happy. She was so stuck and depressed and trapped she didn't know how to do much more than breathe because she'd failed so many times at dieting and taking control that she was just stuck. I'm now free. Thank God.
Anniversary's are typically marked with a meal or a celebration. No special meal for me today - just my typical plan. I will, however, have a nice long workout tonight and push myself hard. Harder than a typical workout - in celebration because I CAN. I CAN run an extra 10 minutes. I can up the incline and handle it. I can do an extra set of squats or lunges or sit-ups or triceps. That's my celebration. I CAN DO HARD THINGS.
No comments:
Post a Comment